Dies a thousand deaths. He does. Apparently a soldier dies but once. I wouldn’t know about the latter statement. The former one I’m duly familiar with. It’s certainly a sin, and there is much to be said about cultivating the opposing virtue. I’ll cower from that particular task and leave it to the reader to fill in the details however heshe wishes. As I ponder these things I tend to think about all those times when the smallest of actions, had they been undertaken, could have turned the tide in my inner turmoils. A pat on the back helps occasionally. A drink doesn’t, generally, even if it gets labeled liquid courage.
Our acts our angels are or good or ill, our constant shadows that walk by us still.(John Fletcher) This little chunk of wisdom, the implications of which generally lurk in the “shadows” is interesting to look at from the standpoint of habit formation (don’t be afraid to pick your favorite school of psychology to interpret how habits happen). The more we do something, the harder it is to retrain ourselves to replace it with something else. No matter how much you train, even the slightest slip up brings you back to your old habits. (if only for a short time, and certainly not erasing the new habits) A constant shadow nevertheless. Just look back. And if you are afraid of the dark, don’t go there, its all shadows.
Ever dream those dreams where the pain is unidentified but pervasive, the tension thick, the overriding sensation being of punishment from the outside? That is as good a death for a coward as any.
I wonder about our generation. What are we up to? What are we achieving? What habits are we forming?
,tose
